Posted by: Arden Compton | December 21, 2009

Testimonial from an addicts wife

Arden,
I have so appreciated how much you have helped me over the past months that I wanted to share the relief and freedom I have experienced since coming to see you. I had been married to my husband for 6 years when I found out he was addicted to pornography and had been since he was a young child. He was also pursuing other women in his workplace. This was very upsetting and I experienced so many negative emotions that it was debilitating. I had several instances when I spent the nights throwing up, other nights were spent hyperventilating to the point of being totally unable to even move my own body, and so many nights were spent awake stewing over how my life had crumbled around my feet. I thought my marriage was over! As a wife I felt discarded, used and so angry! I went to see several different counselors who offered no relief and who actually did more damage than help. Their message to me was that my husband would never recover and that I should expect him to “relapse” throughout the rest of our lives if our marriage survived. I was so discouraged, and desperate. I had no idea what to do. The stress and feelings of rage and hate were so dark and overwhelming. Then I had a friend refer me to Arden. At first I wanted my husband to go, because he is the one who had the addiction. When Arden mentioned to my husband that he works with wives too, I was a little hesitant because I had experienced other men counselors who were very unsympathetic. I was at the last straw, I thought if this doesn’t work, I will get a divorce, I couldn’t live this way for the rest of my life. Arden opened my eyes with so many amazing insights, and the ability to overcome these dark feelings that come along with being in this situation. He taught me so much about the atonement and how to use it in my life, while being sensitive to the situation I found myself in. He gave me hope, he gave my husband hope, and the message that we could survive this! He knew that we didn’t have to “suffer” with this addiction for the rest of our lives. While Arden has been working with my husband it’s been amazing to see the changes that have occurred. He is free of the cravings of pornography, he doesn’t think of it all the time, and has truly been able to use the atonement to overcome his addiction. As I have worked with Arden, I have been able to let go of the anger and hate to see the Lords plan for me in all of this. I have hope for our marriage and I feel the light shining within me again.
Thank you, Arden for sharing with us your gifts and helping us through this challenge. I will be forever grateful to you!
Your Friend,
Susan

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